I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
