he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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