Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
