What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
