I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
