If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
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