clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
