Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
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