Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Randomize