There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Randomize
