I'm passing your future prison.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
