So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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