I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
Randomize
