that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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