oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize
