the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
Randomize
