Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
Randomize
