Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Randomize
