the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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