3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
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