over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
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