Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Randomize
