Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
No subtext here. People are naked.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
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