you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Randomize
