its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
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