idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
Randomize
