are you still at the devil's house?
K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
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