in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
Randomize
