i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize
