This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
