why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
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