He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
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