Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
