I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
When are your genitals available?
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
