oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
