Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Randomize
