Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
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