Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
is that a dick in a sweater?
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
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