Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
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