Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
