Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize
