On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Randomize
