i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
Randomize
