is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize
