I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
And then my night got REAL pukey
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
Randomize
