also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
My vagina just recognized that song.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
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