On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize