Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize