no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
Randomize
