Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Randomize
