Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
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